The Dream, the Drive… and the Silence

When I made the decision to return to acting later in life, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy. I had taken time off to raise my children, to work, to serve. I had done the right things, the faithful things, the necessary things. But deep down, the dream had never left me. It just sat there—quiet, patient, waiting for me to come back.

And when I finally did, I was excited, hopeful, and more determined than ever.

But what followed?

Fifty auditions. Zero bookings.

No callbacks. No “We’ll keep you in mind.” Just… nothing.

As a woman of faith, I expected rejection. I did. But I also expected favor. Breakthrough. A sign that God saw me and would reward the step of faith I had taken.

Instead, I was left with silence. And honestly? It hurt.

When the “No” Feels Personal

Rejection is never easy, but when you’ve poured your heart into something—especially something you believe you were called to—it hits differently.

Every “no” felt like a whisper:
“You’re not enough.”
“You waited too long.”
“Why would they choose you?”

And let’s be honest—those lies are loud. Louder than faith on some days.

I started to doubt not just my talent, but my calling. I questioned whether I had misunderstood God’s timing. I wondered if the door had closed and I’d simply missed it.

But then I remembered something that changed everything:

God doesn’t waste anything—not even rejection.

What Rejection Taught Me About Trust

I wish I could say I handled every “no” with grace. That I shrugged off each rejection and kept walking in peace. But I didn’t. I cried. I questioned. I even thought about quitting.

But somewhere in the middle of my disappointment, God began to whisper back. Not with loud answers, but with quiet truths:

• “You are not rejected. You are protected.”
  
• “Delay is not denial.”
  
• “This is not punishment. It’s preparation.”
  

Rejection taught me to trust God’s character, not just His gifts. It taught me that His plan is not just about getting the role—it’s about becoming the person who can handle it.

The Power of a “Not Yet”

Sometimes God says “no” because we’re not ready.
Other times, He says “not yet” because the role isn’t ready for us.

I started to shift my perspective. Instead of asking, “Why not me?” I started asking, “What are you doing in me, Lord?”

That changed everything.

I took acting classes again—not to be seen, but to grow.
I volunteered more—not to stay busy, but to stay grounded.
I leaned into scripture—not to escape rejection, but to understand purpose.

And I realized something that gave me peace:

My faith doesn’t just get tested when life falls apart. It gets tested when life is quiet.

Faith in the Waiting Room

The casting room is a funny place. You enter a Zoom meeting with a dozen people who kind of look like you, smile nervously, and wait. Sometimes for hours. Sometimes for days to hear back, while there are times you don’t hear back at all.

It’s a lot like faith, honestly.

You prepare. You show up. You wait.
And then… sometimes, nothing.

But here’s the thing: God is never absent in the waiting room.

He sees you when no one else does. He’s working when it looks like nothing is happening. And He’s building something deeper than confidence—He’s building character.

Rejection Isn’t the End

After 50 no’s, I finally booked a role. It wasn’t a blockbuster. But it was mine. And it felt so good.

Not because I needed the credit—but because it reminded me that God hadn’t forgotten me.

But here’s the real miracle: By the time the “yes” came, I no longer needed it to believe I was on the right path. The no’s had already strengthened my faith. They had stripped away ego, taught me endurance, and anchored me in trust.

So when the yes arrived, it wasn’t validation—it was confirmation.

He Sees You

If you’re walking through rejection right now—whether it’s in your career, your relationships, or your personal dreams—I want you to know this:

You are seen. You are loved. You are not forgotten.

God isn’t holding out on you. He’s holding you through the no’s. He’s shaping you, refining you, preparing you. Because the right yes isn’t just about success—it’s about alignment.

And when it comes, you’ll know you were ready. Not just on the outside, but on the inside too.

So keep showing up. Keep praying. Keep trusting.

Because even after the 50th “no,” God’s plan is still a resounding yes.